Lately, I have seen countless memes about that one guy. You know, the one who opens doors, plans the special date, wants to spend time with you more than his friends, texts back immediately, would rather see you on your ugly day than any other girl on her best. That guy...
Following these memes, I have seen girls say, "They don't exist." Tumblr and FaceBook are full of these. A few weeks back, I took a look back on my Tumblr and saw them on my own page. I have periods of feelings, and my Tumblr is a much better representation of those periods. I have some that evoke female power, some that express my depression concerning the passing of my brother, others that express my sadness with guys and their complete inability to measure up to what I thought they should, and some that are just representations of my existential mind.
I think I always knew this "guy" existed. I was always pretty sure that those of us who didn't think they did were wrong. I suppose that it is easier to think the other party is the problem. From one who thought they would be the perfect girlfriend, I now know how usually wrong that is. It isn't that they are the problem, it is that we are all the problem. None of us is perfect. Usually, when I see someone go through girlfriends/boyfriends at an abnormally high rate I look at the common denominator. I have been that common denominator. I was searching for someone that measured up to what I thought was perfection in a partner.
I never found him. He found me. And oddly enough, I tend to look at our relationship and see what most people wish they had. I have "that guy." There was a moment when I realized how " unconditional his love was for me. He saw my ugliness and embraced it. And through that unconditional love, I have found a deep love for him. It is amazing how much he loves me at my complete and utter worst.
Yesterday, I saw a FaceBook quote that stated, "We just want a person who listens to us, supports us, and falls in love with us every day." I though, "Do we? Is that what we want?" I think so, and I think that we want that more when we don't have it. I am lucky to have it, and I too often take it for granted. How much I wish that my other girlfriends could experience the joy, care and concern I receive daily. I couldn't ask for something more.
I guess, I just realize that it is so easy to believe that "that guy" doesn't exist. They do... 'cause I got one. And, with there being over 6 billion people in the world, I know there are more. I also know that it is our duty as girls (and boys) to hold out for the most right thing. Nothing is ever perfect, but there is someone who works with our imperfections...that's the point. I want perfect, but unless I can produce perfection, I will never get it. The biggest difference between he and I is that he doesn't expect me to be any other way than who I am at this very moment. Think I found a keeper...
Following these memes, I have seen girls say, "They don't exist." Tumblr and FaceBook are full of these. A few weeks back, I took a look back on my Tumblr and saw them on my own page. I have periods of feelings, and my Tumblr is a much better representation of those periods. I have some that evoke female power, some that express my depression concerning the passing of my brother, others that express my sadness with guys and their complete inability to measure up to what I thought they should, and some that are just representations of my existential mind.
I think I always knew this "guy" existed. I was always pretty sure that those of us who didn't think they did were wrong. I suppose that it is easier to think the other party is the problem. From one who thought they would be the perfect girlfriend, I now know how usually wrong that is. It isn't that they are the problem, it is that we are all the problem. None of us is perfect. Usually, when I see someone go through girlfriends/boyfriends at an abnormally high rate I look at the common denominator. I have been that common denominator. I was searching for someone that measured up to what I thought was perfection in a partner.
I never found him. He found me. And oddly enough, I tend to look at our relationship and see what most people wish they had. I have "that guy." There was a moment when I realized how " unconditional his love was for me. He saw my ugliness and embraced it. And through that unconditional love, I have found a deep love for him. It is amazing how much he loves me at my complete and utter worst.
Yesterday, I saw a FaceBook quote that stated, "We just want a person who listens to us, supports us, and falls in love with us every day." I though, "Do we? Is that what we want?" I think so, and I think that we want that more when we don't have it. I am lucky to have it, and I too often take it for granted. How much I wish that my other girlfriends could experience the joy, care and concern I receive daily. I couldn't ask for something more.
I guess, I just realize that it is so easy to believe that "that guy" doesn't exist. They do... 'cause I got one. And, with there being over 6 billion people in the world, I know there are more. I also know that it is our duty as girls (and boys) to hold out for the most right thing. Nothing is ever perfect, but there is someone who works with our imperfections...that's the point. I want perfect, but unless I can produce perfection, I will never get it. The biggest difference between he and I is that he doesn't expect me to be any other way than who I am at this very moment. Think I found a keeper...
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