"Getting older's not been on my plans"

  This day last year was hell. Just hell. I had been betrayed by someone I thought I loved, and while trying to wade through the pain, I was denying myself the ability to heal. That seems so long ago.   This year, for the Christmas holiday, I am delightfully happy. And while trying to not put so much pressure on one person for that happiness, I would be remiss if I didn't.   This holiday started, last weekend at my cousin's wedding in Kansas City. After a few days of work, on Wednesday, there was a great family Christmas cookout. Thursday it continued with a fun day with my family eating, fellowshipping, and playing games. It went into the late hours with Mass at my favorite church in the world, and today it kept going with a relaxing Christmas afternoon of more food and good company.   And throughout this entire season there has been one underlying thought: this is nothing like last year. This is nothing like the last 5 years. This is nothing like any other year. And throug

  I asked him a simple question: "what's your biggest fear concerning us?" He couldn't answer, although I know he has at least one. We were driving this morning when I asked, and the thought popped into my head in a continuation of the conversation we had the night before. I told him that there is a small but significant part of me that worries one day he'll decide he's done. For whatever reason, one day he will walk.   But I guess in broad daylight he couldn't figure out his biggest fear. I think his answer was something about kids or something I couldn't assuage. That was my goal, anyway, in asking. Goal diverted.   He came to tuck me in, and tell me what he had just spent the last 2 hours talking to my cousin about: "you," he said. "How much I love you. How much I want to be with you forever. You're independent spirit, how I'll said you'll change." I internally bristled. I am proud of my independent spirit. "Oh

  My boss is very passionate about work/life balance. To him, the two must be maintained or one will fail. For me, someone who likes to work a lot and socialize the same amount, I feel as though I have a good grasp on this concept.   I recently got a laptop at work to make my job easier. I was surprised how much easier it has become. When I was pulled into my boss's office last week, I made the mistake of telling him I had taken some work home. I was immediately told not to do that again. To him, I was going against the very nature of work/life balance. To me, I loved the idea of doing work comfortably on the couch in front of the TV.   As I was conveying to a co-worker how much I liked the idea, she spoke vehemently against it...just like my boss. Difference is I don't have a family that would be affected. Anyway...   This afternoon, our director of production was walked out. Gone. Just in an instant. One moment he was berating me, in jest, for not liking bread pudding, and

  While visiting my family in Arizona, a month back, I got asked this question: are you friends? While sitting next to him on the couch, I got told this statement: you're my best friend. Growing up, I always had at least one best friend. To this day, I could name at least 4 people I consider to be my best friends. But, they all have something in common...they are all very romantically involved with someone. Two are married, one will be shortly and the other has been in a long term relationship.   I always believed that when you are in a relationship it is best to be friends first then lovers second. But I never thought I would truly understand that concept. Honestly, being best friends meant time. Being best friends meant that memories from long past had to sustain you. It was never a connection issue. It was time. How wrong I have been.   Of the 4 people I consider to be besties, I have known them all over 9 years. So I have the time. And over that time memories have been forged