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Happy birthday, beloved


   
   
  I laid the bright yellow blanket on the ground not wanting to get my pants wet from the melting snow. I had my pack of smokes, cold cup of coffee, and the sacred silence. So, I sat. In compete sacred silence, I sat. But what to say?
    If I believed that he hasn't been with me every day, I never would have left the day we interned him. If I believed that he was the remains that lie beneath the earth, I would have spent my afternoon digging the cold ground only to pick up that black box forever then to be carried around. But, he isn't there. He is as close as breathing, and he always will be till the day I see his prefect smile again.
    You see, getting older wasn't in his plans. From this day, 34 years ago, till now he will always only be 29. He will be 29 and perfect. Today is Andy's birthday. This day a chubby, bald, imperfect baby was born who grew to be a handsome, caring, imperfect man who lived and loved with almost as much perfection as any human can love. "When he spoke of you, it was with such admiration."
    My parent's greatest gift to me, after giving me life and love, was the gift of my brother. And, although today we celebrate his birthday, I can't help but celebrate love. The love I received from him was so unwarranted but never given with anything less than his everything.
    As I sat there in my silence, I couldn't seem to find anything to say. But, it was a comfortable and completely adequate silence. It was us...meeting in the place we laid his body. We promised to meet tonight at home, tomorrow at work, and every day and every where til we hold each other again.
              "Happy birthday, beloved."

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